I’ve had a lot of great pizza in my life and a lot of bad.  Even that bad can be edible.  Even the bad can be tolerable.  But sometimes the bad can’t be written about.  It would defeat the purpose of this thing if I wrote about dreadful pies with little subjectivity.  I’d be done within a couple paragraphs. If a pizzeria touts itself as one thing but doesn’t deliver, that’s worth writing about.

This brings me to this weeks post, Alberto’s Pizza in the Dupont Circle neighborhood of Washington, DC.

I’ll give a brief overview of my experiences in D.C.  I have done by share of bar-hopping and dining out in and around Dupont.  But I never noticed this pizzeria.  Was my one-track mind fixated on other things, other foods, other experiences?  Or was it easy to miss?  In the 15+ years its been open I’m reasonably certain I’ve never set foot in the place.

Our nation’s capital, like many cities, continues to grow exponentially with little end in sight.  The infrastructure and public transportation system is equipped to handle that. Well at least I think it is.

With an aggressively stuffy city, and the neighborhood within, I expect the food to be prepared and served with a similar energy.  That’s not necessarily a positive or an it is what it is declaration.  It’s more of what DC is and will continue to be, transient and immersed in its own universe.  That’s not my universe.

Enough of the monologue.  This pizza was disappointing.  I ordered 3 slices due to the uniqueness of the ingredients and toppings.  Unfortunately, each came out to $5+ a slice. I understand the location and high costs of running a business so the price isn’t that terrible.

But for the quality, I felt short-changed here.

I will attempt to find the positives with these selections.

Number one – the Zucchini, Parmesan, and Parsley.   For a place that touts itself as Chicago Style, I don’t know if this is that.   The thin crust on all three seemed flimsy and lifeless.   They all felt under cooked but this was the best of the three.  The zucchini and parsley were the saving graces.  The sauce tasted like strawberry jelly. It wasn’t even  jam like. The cheese was ok but when I get around to the next two, this seems feels even worse.

I’m hard pressed to find silver linings.

Number two – the Goat Cheese and Mushroom.  Like the former, I had high hopes.   The goat cheese and mushroom were fine on their own but why was it on top of the mozzarella and that jelly sauce? Did I miss something or was this an accident?  This was an opportunity lost.

Number three – the Chicken Pesto.  If there was chicken, I wouldn’t have known.  This was likely imitation pesto, if there is such a thing, drizzled over that same cheese slice.  I must have missed something.  I never thought I would have tasted bad pesto but this was it.  I’m heartbroken.

I write this with the understanding that they’re open late night on the weekends, so the expectations aren’t astronomical but the pizza should be decent.  And I went at lunch time. I should get my monies worth. This wasn’t even close.

For my friends that know the area, this may be a potential teaser for either next week or soon thereafter.  There’s a lot of action on that street, on that block, and even more micro than that.

This sign is kind of funny even though it goes over my head, just like this pizza.

On to better,

Ideen